1    Good Margaret, run thee to the parlor;
2    There shalt thou find my cousin Beatrice
3    Proposing with the prince and Claudio:
4    Whisper her ear and tell her, I and Ursula
5    Walk in the orchard and our whole discourse
6    Is all of her; say that thou overheard'st us;
7    And bid her steal into the pleached bower,
8    Where honeysuckles, ripen'd by the sun,
9    Forbid the sun to enter, like favourites,
10   Made proud by princes, that advance their pride
11   Against that power that bred it: there will she hide her,
12   To listen our purpose. This is thy office;
13   Bear thee well in it and leave us alone.

14   I'll make her come, I warrant you, presently.

15   Now, Ursula, when Beatrice doth come,
16   As we do trace this alley up and down,
17   Our talk must only be of Benedick.
18   When I do name him, let it be thy part
19   To praise him more than ever man did merit:
20   My talk to thee must be how Benedick
21   Is sick in love with Beatrice. Of this matter
22   Is little Cupid's crafty arrow made,
23   That only wounds by hearsay.
Enter BEATRICE, behind
24   Now begin;
25   For look where Beatrice, like a lapwing, runs
26   Close by the ground, to hear our conference.

27   The pleasant'st angling is to see the fish
28   Cut with her golden oars the silver stream,
29   And greedily devour the treacherous bait:
30   So angle we for Beatrice; who even now
31   Is couched in the woodbine coverture.
32   Fear you not my part of the dialogue.

33   Then go we near her, that her ear lose nothing
34   Of the false sweet bait that we lay for it.
Approaching the bower
35   No, truly, Ursula, she is too disdainful;
36   I know her spirits are as coy and wild
37   As haggerds of the rock.

38   But are you sure
39   That Benedick loves Beatrice so entirely?

40   So says the prince and my new-trothed lord.

41   And did they bid you tell her of it, madam?

42   They did entreat me to acquaint her of it;
43   But I persuaded them, if they loved Benedick,
44   To wish him wrestle with affection,
45   And never to let Beatrice know of it.

46   Why did you so? Doth not the gentleman
47   Deserve as full as fortunate a bed
48   As ever Beatrice shall couch upon?

49   O god of love! I know he doth deserve
50   As much as may be yielded to a man:
51   But Nature never framed a woman's heart
52   Of prouder stuff than that of Beatrice;
53   Disdain and scorn ride sparkling in her eyes,
54   Misprising what they look on, and her wit
55   Values itself so highly that to her
56   All matter else seems weak: she cannot love,
57   Nor take no shape nor project of affection,
58   She is so self-endeared.

59   Sure, I think so;
60   And therefore certainly it were not good
61   She knew his love, lest she make sport at it.

62   Why, you speak truth. I never yet saw man,
63   How wise, how noble, young, how rarely featured,
64   But she would spell him backward: if fair-faced,
65   She would swear the gentleman should be her sister;
66   If black, why, Nature, drawing of an antique,
67   Made a foul blot; if tall, a lance ill-headed;
68   If low, an agate very vilely cut;
69   If speaking, why, a vane blown with all winds;
70   If silent, why, a block moved with none.
71   So turns she every man the wrong side out
72   And never gives to truth and virtue that
73   Which simpleness and merit purchaseth.

74   Sure, sure, such carping is not commendable.

75   No, not to be so odd and from all fashions
76   As Beatrice is, cannot be commendable:
77   But who dare tell her so? If I should speak,
78   She would mock me into air; O, she would laugh me
79   Out of myself, press me to death with wit.
80   Therefore let Benedick, like cover'd fire,
81   Consume away in sighs, waste inwardly:
82   It were a better death than die with mocks,
83   Which is as bad as die with tickling.

84   Yet tell her of it: hear what she will say.

85   No; rather I will go to Benedick
86   And counsel him to fight against his passion.
87   And, truly, I'll devise some honest slanders
88   To stain my cousin with: one doth not know
89   How much an ill word may empoison liking.

90   O, do not do your cousin such a wrong.
91   She cannot be so much without true judgment--
92   Having so swift and excellent a wit
93   As she is prized to have--as to refuse
94   So rare a gentleman as Signior Benedick.

95   He is the only man of Italy.
96   Always excepted my dear Claudio.

97   I pray you, be not angry with me, madam,
98   Speaking my fancy: Signior Benedick,
99   For shape, for bearing, argument and valour,
100  Goes foremost in report through Italy.

101  Indeed, he hath an excellent good name.

102  His excellence did earn it, ere he had it.
103  When are you married, madam?

104  Why, every day, to-morrow. Come, go in:
105  I'll show thee some attires, and have thy counsel
106  Which is the best to furnish me to-morrow.

107  She's limed, I warrant you: we have caught her, madam.

108  If it proves so, then loving goes by haps:
109  Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps.

Coming forward
110  What fire is in mine ears? Can this be true?
111  Stand I condemn'd for pride and scorn so much?
112  Contempt, farewell! and maiden pride, adieu!
113  No glory lives behind the back of such.
114  And, Benedick, love on; I will requite thee,
115  Taming my wild heart to thy loving hand:
116  If thou dost love, my kindness shall incite thee
117  To bind our loves up in a holy band;
118  For others say thou dost deserve, and I
119  Believe it better than reportingly.