1    Nay, if there be no remedy for it, but that you will
2    needs buy and sell men and women like beasts, we
3    shall have all the world drink brown and white bastard.

4    O heavens! what stuff is here

5    'Twas never merry world since, of two usuries, the
6    merriest was put down, and the worser allowed by
7    order of law a furred gown to keep him warm; and
8    furred with fox and lamb-skins too, to signify, that
9    craft, being richer than innocency, stands for the facing.

10   Come your way, sir. 'Bless you, good father friar.

11   And you, good brother father. What offence hath
12   this man made you, sir?

13   Marry, sir, he hath offended the law: and, sir, we
14   take him to be a thief too, sir; for we have found
15   upon him, sir, a strange picklock, which we have
16   sent to the deputy.

17   Fie, sirrah! a bawd, a wicked bawd!
18   The evil that thou causest to be done,
19   That is thy means to live. Do thou but think
20   What 'tis to cram a maw or clothe a back
21   From such a filthy vice: say to thyself,
22   From their abominable and beastly touches
23   I drink, I eat, array myself, and live.
24   Canst thou believe thy living is a life,
25   So stinkingly depending? Go mend, go mend.

26   Indeed, it does stink in some sort, sir; but yet,
27   sir, I would prove--

28   Nay, if the devil have given thee proofs for sin,
29   Thou wilt prove his. Take him to prison, officer:
30   Correction and instruction must both work
31   Ere this rude beast will profit.

32   He must before the deputy, sir; he has given him
33   warning: the deputy cannot abide a whoremaster: if
34   he be a whoremonger, and comes before him, he were
35   as good go a mile on his errand.

36   That we were all, as some would seem to be,
37   From our faults, as faults from seeming, free!

38   His neck will come to your waist,--a cord, sir.

39   I spy comfort; I cry bail. Here's a gentleman and a
40   friend of mine.

41   How now, noble Pompey! What, at the wheels of
42   Caesar? art thou led in triumph? What, is there
43   none of Pygmalion's images, newly made woman, to be
44   had now, for putting the hand in the pocket and
45   extracting it clutch'd? What reply, ha? What
46   sayest thou to this tune, matter and method? Is't
47   not drowned i' the last rain, ha? What sayest
48   thou, Trot? Is the world as it was, man? Which is
49   the way? Is it sad, and few words? or how? The
50   trick of it?

51   Still thus, and thus; still worse!

52   How doth my dear morsel, thy mistress? Procures she
53   still, ha?

54   Troth, sir, she hath eaten up all her beef, and she
55   is herself in the tub.

56   Why, 'tis good; it is the right of it; it must be
57   so: ever your fresh whore and your powdered bawd:
58   an unshunned consequence; it must be so. Art going
59   to prison, Pompey?

60   Yes, faith, sir.

61   Why, 'tis not amiss, Pompey. Farewell: go, say I
62   sent thee thither. For debt, Pompey? or how?

63   For being a bawd, for being a bawd.

64   Well, then, imprison him: if imprisonment be the
65   due of a bawd, why, 'tis his right: bawd is he
66   doubtless, and of antiquity too; bawd-born.
67   Farewell, good Pompey. Commend me to the prison,
68   Pompey: you will turn good husband now, Pompey; you
69   will keep the house.

70   I hope, sir, your good worship will be my bail.

71   No, indeed, will I not, Pompey; it is not the wear.
72   I will pray, Pompey, to increase your bondage: If
73   you take it not patiently, why, your mettle is the
74   more. Adieu, trusty Pompey. 'Bless you, friar.

75   And you.

76   Does Bridget paint still, Pompey, ha?

77   Come your ways, sir; come.

78   You will not bail me, then, sir?

79   Then, Pompey, nor now. What news abroad, friar?
80   what news?

81   Come your ways, sir; come.

82   Go to kennel, Pompey; go.
Exeunt ELBOW, POMPEY and Officers
83   What news, friar, of the duke?

84   I know none. Can you tell me of any?

85   Some say he is with the Emperor of Russia; other
86   some, he is in Rome: but where is he, think you?

87   I know not where; but wheresoever, I wish him well.

88   It was a mad fantastical trick of him to steal from
89   the state, and usurp the beggary he was never born
90   to. Lord Angelo dukes it well in his absence; he
91   puts transgression to 't.

92   He does well in 't.

93   A little more lenity to lechery would do no harm in
94   him: something too crabbed that way, friar.

95   It is too general a vice, and severity must cure it.

96   Yes, in good sooth, the vice is of a great kindred;
97   it is well allied: but it is impossible to extirp
98   it quite, friar, till eating and drinking be put
99   down. They say this Angelo was not made by man and
100  woman after this downright way of creation: is it
101  true, think you?

102  How should he be made, then?

103  Some report a sea-maid spawned him; some, that he
104  was begot between two stock-fishes. But it is
105  certain that when he makes water his urine is
106  congealed ice; that I know to be true: and he is a
107  motion generative; that's infallible.

108  You are pleasant, sir, and speak apace.

109  Why, what a ruthless thing is this in him, for the
110  rebellion of a codpiece to take away the life of a
111  man! Would the duke that is absent have done this?
112  Ere he would have hanged a man for the getting a
113  hundred bastards, he would have paid for the nursing
114  a thousand: he had some feeling of the sport: he
115  knew the service, and that instructed him to mercy.

116  I never heard the absent duke much detected for
117  women; he was not inclined that way.

118  O, sir, you are deceived.

119  'Tis not possible.

120  Who, not the duke? yes, your beggar of fifty; and
121  his use was to put a ducat in her clack-dish: the
122  duke had crotchets in him. He would be drunk too;
123  that let me inform you.

124  You do him wrong, surely.

125  Sir, I was an inward of his. A shy fellow was the
126  duke: and I believe I know the cause of his
127  withdrawing.

128  What, I prithee, might be the cause?

129  No, pardon; 'tis a secret must be locked within the
130  teeth and the lips: but this I can let you
131  understand, the greater file of the subject held the
132  duke to be wise.

133  Wise! why, no question but he was.

134  A very superficial, ignorant, unweighing fellow.

135  Either this is the envy in you, folly, or mistaking:
136  the very stream of his life and the business he hath
137  helmed must upon a warranted need give him a better
138  proclamation. Let him be but testimonied in his own
139  bringings-forth, and he shall appear to the
140  envious a scholar, a statesman and a soldier.
141  Therefore you speak unskilfully: or if your
142  knowledge be more it is much darkened in your malice.

143  Sir, I know him, and I love him.

144  Love talks with better knowledge, and knowledge with
145  dearer love.

146  Come, sir, I know what I know.

147  I can hardly believe that, since you know not what
148  you speak. But, if ever the duke return, as our
149  prayers are he may, let me desire you to make your
150  answer before him. If it be honest you have spoke,
151  you have courage to maintain it: I am bound to call
152  upon you; and, I pray you, your name?

153  Sir, my name is Lucio; well known to the duke.

154  He shall know you better, sir, if I may live to
155  report you.

156  I fear you not.

157  O, you hope the duke will return no more; or you
158  imagine me too unhurtful an opposite. But indeed I
159  can do you little harm; you'll forswear this again.

160  I'll be hanged first: thou art deceived in me,
161  friar. But no more of this. Canst thou tell if
162  Claudio die to-morrow or no?

163  Why should he die, sir?

164  Why? For filling a bottle with a tundish. I would
165  the duke we talk of were returned again: the
166  ungenitured agent will unpeople the province with
167  continency; sparrows must not build in his
168  house-eaves, because they are lecherous. The duke
169  yet would have dark deeds darkly answered; he would
170  never bring them to light: would he were returned!
171  Marry, this Claudio is condemned for untrussing.
172  Farewell, good friar: I prithee, pray for me. The
173  duke, I say to thee again, would eat mutton on
174  Fridays. He's not past it yet, and I say to thee,
175  he would mouth with a beggar, though she smelt brown
176  bread and garlic: say that I said so. Farewell.

177  No might nor greatness in mortality
178  Can censure 'scape; back-wounding calumny
179  The whitest virtue strikes. What king so strong
180  Can tie the gall up in the slanderous tongue?
181  But who comes here?

182  Go; away with her to prison!

183  Good my lord, be good to me; your honour is accounted
184  a merciful man; good my lord.

185  Double and treble admonition, and still forfeit in
186  the same kind! This would make mercy swear and play
187  the tyrant.

188  A bawd of eleven years' continuance, may it please
189  your honour.

190  My lord, this is one Lucio's information against me.
191  Mistress Kate Keepdown was with child by him in the
192  duke's time; he promised her marriage: his child
193  is a year and a quarter old, come Philip and Jacob:
194  I have kept it myself; and see how he goes about to abuse me!

195  That fellow is a fellow of much licence: let him be
196  called before us. Away with her to prison! Go to;
197  no more words.
Exeunt Officers with MISTRESS OVERDONE
198  Provost, my brother Angelo will not be altered;
199  Claudio must die to-morrow: let him be furnished
200  with divines, and have all charitable preparation.
201  if my brother wrought by my pity, it should not be
202  so with him.

203  So please you, this friar hath been with him, and
204  advised him for the entertainment of death.

205  Good even, good father.

206  Bliss and goodness on you!

207  Of whence are you?

208  Not of this country, though my chance is now
209  To use it for my time: I am a brother
210  Of gracious order, late come from the See
211  In special business from his holiness.

212  What news abroad i' the world?

213  None, but that there is so great a fever on
214  goodness, that the dissolution of it must cure it:
215  novelty is only in request; and it is as dangerous
216  to be aged in any kind of course, as it is virtuous
217  to be constant in any undertaking. There is scarce
218  truth enough alive to make societies secure; but
219  security enough to make fellowships accurst: much
220  upon this riddle runs the wisdom of the world. This
221  news is old enough, yet it is every day's news. I
222  pray you, sir, of what disposition was the duke?

223  One that, above all other strifes, contended
224  especially to know himself.

225  What pleasure was he given to?

226  Rather rejoicing to see another merry, than merry at
227  any thing which professed to make him rejoice: a
228  gentleman of all temperance. But leave we him to
229  his events, with a prayer they may prove prosperous;
230  and let me desire to know how you find Claudio
231  prepared. I am made to understand that you have
232  lent him visitation.

233  He professes to have received no sinister measure
234  from his judge, but most willingly humbles himself
235  to the determination of justice: yet had he framed
236  to himself, by the instruction of his frailty, many
237  deceiving promises of life; which I by my good
238  leisure have discredited to him, and now is he
239  resolved to die.

240  You have paid the heavens your function, and the
241  prisoner the very debt of your calling. I have
242  laboured for the poor gentleman to the extremest
243  shore of my modesty: but my brother justice have I
244  found so severe, that he hath forced me to tell him
245  he is indeed Justice.

246  If his own life answer the straitness of his
247  proceeding, it shall become him well; wherein if he
248  chance to fail, he hath sentenced himself.

249  I am going to visit the prisoner. Fare you well.

250  Peace be with you!
Exeunt ESCALUS and Provost
251  He who the sword of heaven will bear
252  Should be as holy as severe;
253  Pattern in himself to know,
254  Grace to stand, and virtue go;
255  More nor less to others paying
256  Than by self-offences weighing.
257  Shame to him whose cruel striking
258  Kills for faults of his own liking!
259  Twice treble shame on Angelo,
260  To weed my vice and let his grow!
261  O, what may man within him hide,
262  Though angel on the outward side!
263  How may likeness made in crimes,
264  Making practise on the times,
265  To draw with idle spiders' strings
266  Most ponderous and substantial things!
267  Craft against vice I must apply:
268  With Angelo to-night shall lie
269  His old betrothed but despised;
270  So disguise shall, by the disguised,
271  Pay with falsehood false exacting,
272  And perform an old contracting.