1 Come, shelter, shelter: I have removed Falstaff's 2 horse, and he frets like a gummed velvet.
PRINCE HENRY
3 Stand close.
Enter FALSTAFF
FALSTAFF
4 Poins! Poins, and be hanged! Poins!
PRINCE HENRY
5 Peace, ye fat-kidneyed rascal! what a brawling dost 6 thou keep!
FALSTAFF
7 Where's Poins, Hal?
PRINCE HENRY
8 He is walked up to the top of the hill: I'll go seek him.
FALSTAFF
9 I am accursed to rob in that thief's company: the 10 rascal hath removed my horse, and tied him I know 11 not where. If I travel but four foot by the squier 12 further afoot, I shall break my wind. Well, I doubt 13 not but to die a fair death for all this, if I 14 'scape hanging for killing that rogue. I have 15 forsworn his company hourly any time this two and 16 twenty years, and yet I am bewitched with the 17 rogue's company. If the rascal hath not given me 18 medicines to make me love him, I'll be hanged; it 19 could not be else: I have drunk medicines. Poins! 20 Hal! a plague upon you both! Bardolph! Peto! 21 I'll starve ere I'll rob a foot further. An 'twere 22 not as good a deed as drink, to turn true man and to 23 leave these rogues, I am the veriest varlet that 24 ever chewed with a tooth. Eight yards of uneven 25 ground is threescore and ten miles afoot with me; 26 and the stony-hearted villains know it well enough: 27 a plague upon it when thieves cannot be true one to another! They whistle 28 Whew! A plague upon you all! Give me my horse, you 29 rogues; give me my horse, and be hanged!
PRINCE HENRY
30 Peace, ye fat-guts! lie down; lay thine ear close 31 to the ground and list if thou canst hear the tread 32 of travellers.
FALSTAFF
33 Have you any levers to lift me up again, being down? 34 'Sblood, I'll not bear mine own flesh so far afoot 35 again for all the coin in thy father's exchequer. 36 What a plague mean ye to colt me thus?
PRINCE HENRY
37 Thou liest; thou art not colted, thou art uncolted.
FALSTAFF
38 I prithee, good Prince Hal, help me to my horse, 39 good king's son.
PRINCE HENRY
40 Out, ye rogue! shall I be your ostler?
FALSTAFF
41 Go, hang thyself in thine own heir-apparent 42 garters! If I be ta'en, I'll peach for this. An I 43 have not ballads made on you all and sung to filthy 44 tunes, let a cup of sack be my poison: when a jest 45 is so forward, and afoot too! I hate it.
Enter GADSHILL, BARDOLPH and PETO
GADSHILL
46 Stand.
FALSTAFF
47 So I do, against my will.
POINS
48 O, 'tis our setter: I know his voice. Bardolph, 49 what news?
BARDOLPH
50 Case ye, case ye; on with your vizards: there 's 51 money of the king's coming down the hill; 'tis going 52 to the king's exchequer.
FALSTAFF
53 You lie, ye rogue; 'tis going to the king's tavern.
GADSHILL
54 There's enough to make us all.
FALSTAFF
55 To be hanged.
PRINCE HENRY
56 Sirs, you four shall front them in the narrow lane; 57 Ned Poins and I will walk lower: if they 'scape 58 from your encounter, then they light on us.
PETO
59 How many be there of them?
GADSHILL
60 Some eight or ten.
FALSTAFF
61 'Zounds, will they not rob us?
PRINCE HENRY
62 What, a coward, Sir John Paunch?
FALSTAFF
63 Indeed, I am not John of Gaunt, your grandfather; 64 but yet no coward, Hal.
PRINCE HENRY
65 Well, we leave that to the proof.
POINS
66 Sirrah Jack, thy horse stands behind the hedge: 67 when thou needest him, there thou shalt find him. 68 Farewell, and stand fast.
FALSTAFF
69 Now cannot I strike him, if I should be hanged.
PRINCE HENRY
70 Ned, where are our disguises?
POINS
71 Here, hard by: stand close.
Exeunt PRINCE HENRY and POINS
FALSTAFF
72 Now, my masters, happy man be his dole, say I: 73 every man to his business.
Enter the Travellers
First Traveller
74 Come, neighbour: the boy shall lead our horses down 75 the hill; we'll walk afoot awhile, and ease our legs.
Thieves
76 Stand!
Travellers
77 Jesus bless us!
FALSTAFF
78 Strike; down with them; cut the villains' throats: 79 ah! whoreson caterpillars! bacon-fed knaves! they 80 hate us youth: down with them: fleece them.
Travellers
81 O, we are undone, both we and ours for ever!
FALSTAFF
82 Hang ye, gorbellied knaves, are ye undone? No, ye 83 fat chuffs: I would your store were here! On, 84 bacons, on! What, ye knaves! young men must live. 85 You are Grand-jurors, are ye? we'll jure ye, 'faith.
Here they rob them and bind them. Exeunt
Re-enter PRINCE HENRY and POINS
PRINCE HENRY
86 The thieves have bound the true men. Now could thou 87 and I rob the thieves and go merrily to London, it 88 would be argument for a week, laughter for a month 89 and a good jest for ever.
POINS
90 Stand close; I hear them coming.
Enter the Thieves again
FALSTAFF
91 Come, my masters, let us share, and then to horse 92 before day. An the Prince and Poins be not two 93 arrant cowards, there's no equity stirring: there's 94 no more valour in that Poins than in a wild-duck.
PRINCE HENRY
95 Your money!
POINS
96 Villains!
PRINCE HENRY
97 Got with much ease. Now merrily to horse: 98 The thieves are all scatter'd and possess'd with fear 99 So strongly that they dare not meet each other; 100 Each takes his fellow for an officer. 101 Away, good Ned. Falstaff sweats to death, 102 And lards the lean earth as he walks along: 103 Were 't not for laughing, I should pity him.